bicara soal BFF, selain BFF cewek yang jumlahnya mungkin cuma sebanyak jari di satu tangan, gue juga punya dua orang sahabat yang bergender laki-laki.
yang satu, Pooh Magenta Bear, pernah gue "interview" di sini. kenal dan bersahabat dengan doi sejak 1995! intensitas kita ketemuan emang udah menjarang karena kesibukan ini dan itu, tapi bisa dibilang kita rutin ketemu. entah buat ngopi cantik dadakan, bukber, atau yah, ketika ada occassion tertentu melibatkan temen-temen sekolah kita - but not another funeral, i hope :(. sebenernya bukan hal yang esensial untuk dibahas, tapi Pooh Bear is gay. gue rasa gue orang pertama yang dia kasih tau when he first came out, and it meant a lot. pengaruhnya sekarang sih, gue 'bebas' aja kalau kencan sama dia. nggak ada beban 'moril' terhadap keluarga maupun publik. bahkan sahabat-sahabat cewek gue yang lain juga nggak sungkan cipika-cipiki atau pelukan sama dia. well, orang yang nggak kenal kalo ngeliat mungkin heran atau malah nyinyir, tapi what they think about us is entirely none of our business, cencunya.
anyways, sahabat cowok yang satu lagi, let's just call him Level Seven or L7. why that? well, harus disimak terus ceritanya sebelum sampe ke situ, hahaha.
unlike Pooh Bear (PB), he's straight. i never thought it mattered, sih. well, not until these days, at least. selain itu, dalam 10 tahun ini, kita cuma bertatap muka sebanyak tiga kali. understandable, karena dulu dia kuliah trus menetap di bandung. meskipun dia udah di jakarta sejak 2011, tapi kesibukan dan lain hal (oh so cliche) bikin kita baru ketemuan lagi tahun ini.
suatu hari, L7 whatsapp gue setelah berpuluh-puluh bulan tanpa kabar. gue nggak heran juga, sih, because our friendship is like chicken nuggets. you can put it in a freezer for God knows how long, and then one day you just heat it up and find the nuggets still as good as they're supposed to be.
obrolan di whatsapp seputar "ke mane aje looo" dan sedkit nostalgia akhirnya berujung ke rencana meet and greet or emji, as how we used to call it.
karena ini kedua kalinya gue ketemu sama L7 sejak udah berstatus bini orang - udah 7 tahun pula ganti statusnya - tanpa gue sadari, rencana emji nggak bisa dengan gampang dibikin kaya kalo mau kencan sama PB. kalau sama PB, biasanya waktu dan lokasi emji bisa dengan spontan kita tentuin dan gue tinggal bilang sama adit, "eh, besok aku mau emji sama PB, ya," kali ini gue ngerasa nggak bisa ngelakuin hal yang sama. sepertinya superego gue yang ambil kendali, karena tetiba terlintas di pikiran gue untuk ngasih tau adit dulu rencana buat emji ini.
setelah ngobrol sama adit dan dia nggak keberatan (as i thought he wouldn't be sih), barulah gue iyain rencana emji tersebut dan ngebahas soal lokasi. berhubung mau ketemuannya sabtu dan hari itu adit kuliah seharian, akhirnya kita pilih lokasi deket kampus adit jadi gue bisa sembari nungguin doi kuliah and maybe he could join us pas jam istirahat.
...in short, ribet, yahh ciin! xD
so, this is what it's like, this new... phase. when you're having a best friend from the opposite sex (who is straight) and you're married. :|
meskipun begitu, semua keribetan itu emang necessary sih menurut gue. i mean, i myself wouldn't like it kalo adit emji sama BFF-nya yang pere tanpa ngobrolin dulu sama gue dan gak melibatkan gue.
so, finally emjinya jadi juga, adit bisa join pas lagi break kuliah, and everyone's happy.
sementara emji sama L7-nya sendiri serulah, as expected. highlight kabar dari dia adalah cerita backpacking tripnya keliling eropa selama sebulan dengan biaya under 2000 euro sajaah. emang deh, ketemuan sama temen yang single, dan kehidupannya "beda banget" dari domestic life kita sendiri itu menyegarkan banget. selain buat me time, juga ngasih banyaakk perspektif yang fresh dan bikin semangat.
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| God we're old! |
but first, let's start with who L7 is and why he's called L7.
* pertama kali melihat wujudnya waktu MOS/ospek SMA, kebetulan kita sekelas. trus senior yang jadi pendamping kelas nyuruh milih ketua kelas dengan ngajuin beberapa anak sebagai kandidat. anak-anak yang disuruh jadi kandidat ini, entah apa kriterianya, random aja gue rasa, salah satunya L7. mereka masing-masing disuruh memperkenalkan diri dan pas giliran L7, dia maju dan nyebutin namanya dan tempat tinggalnya dengan gaya belagu (first impression lasts forever).
pas MOS udah selesai, ndilalah dia duduk di depan gue dan Reipura - temen semeja gue. and that's when everything started. L7 is a typical class clown. a pied piper yang bisa menarik perhatian semua orang dengan kelakuannya yang... ajaib. kerjaannya ngobroooool melulu sama gue dan Reipura, dan dari ngobrol itu muncullah kelakuan yang aneh-aneh. ngejailin temenlah, ngerjain gurulah (bikin karikatur muka guru was his expertise), bikin ribut, ngakak pas guru ngajar, nyanyi-nyanyi gak jelas, bolos... hahaha.
i remember we used to talk for hours on the phone. heck, i even still remember his home phone number clearly. well, it's either i called him or he called me. but as strange as it may sound, our intimacy never got too "intimate." we talked and talked as though we had been girlfriends. just rambling and talking about everything, and stopped when we're too tired. pas udah kuliah, we still talk to each other regularly. either talking or texting. and yes i can still recall his mobile phone numbers as well.
one other thing about L7 adalah kerap kali bermunculan ide-ide 'segar' dari otaknya.
suatu hari, L7 punya ide "we should form a band!" dan jadilah sebuah band, haha. gue yang waktu itu cuma bisa gonjrang-gonjreng gitaran, diracunin sedemikian rupa sama dia sampe mau belajar main bass. it was my first interaction with the instrument, my first band ever, and he was my first so-called music teacher ever hahaha.
in fact, salah satu kenangan terindah masa remaja (wow seperti judul cerpen majalah anita) gue adalah ngider-ngider sama anak-anak band ini; gue, Reipura, L7, Poer, Pane, Atto, disetiri Poer yang baru lulus les nyetir buat ngeband di kawasan serpong hahaha.
back to L7, ide 'segar' lain dari dia adalah suatu hari dia bikin konsep "level pertemanan." i was rolling my eyes when he first told me about this. jadi, dia bikin level 1 sampe 8 buat mengkategorikan temen-temennya. level 8 dia sebut "platinum." -__-
meskipun begitu, gue langsung seketika merasa spesial sih, begitu dia bilang gue salah satu dari dua temen yang masuk ke level 7 hahahaha... senengnya macam dapet diskon khusus kalo belanja di galeries lafayette atau fasilitas VVIP lounge di bandara aja. anyways, dari sinilah nickname (khusus untuk tulisan ini saja) L7 gue bikin buat dia.
well, anyway, dimulai aja deh wawancara-(kali ini bukan khayal)nya!
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his answers.
How did Riska get into level 7? What makes her deserve that?
L7: 7th level is like highest most honored level on The History of Friendship.. you can't get any higher than that.. unless the 5 stars platinum 7th level. You got to ... earn it! By 'earn' i mean... earning points.. so start collecting your points! hahahaha..
Her qualification includes:
Get at least 86% of my published jokes (320 pts), also understand her jokes (110 pts), make me comfortable and can be 'my self' as much and as long I want! (890 pts), always knows that I know what she knows I know (660 pts), speak and understand English (123 pts), open minded (882 pts), understand.. me (1220 pts), have visited her house and know her family (115 pts), do and love crazy things, stuffs that normal people would never do (771 pts), know me and stay being (close) friends for at least 112 months (930 pts). btw, to get platinum you have to add 5 stars, you can claim your stars every 22 months after.
Why formed a band? Did you see any musical potential from her or the other friends that ultimately became the band members?
L7: I formed a band with her because.. she seemed fun to hang around with.. and maybe fun to work some music as well.. and of course, she likes music.. well.. who doesn't. :D
So far, you guys have proven that yes, straight man and woman can be friends with no "When Harry Met Sally" situation involved. Why do you think that's possible?
L7: Laughing harder than a professional cereal cutter! Hahahahahaha....
Ok... how... how.... well... i think ... some people are just meant to be friends... with no benefits.
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| all hail Nora Ephron. btw, kisah ini terinspirasi dari kisah nyata persahabatan doi sama pria-pria, loh, antara lain Robert Reiner and Billy Crystal himself |
And what makes your friendship lasts this long?
L7: Read answer for the first question.
How much has she changed since 1998?
L7: A LOT! Firstly.. she got married and having a baby, and started to wear veil.. i mean.. I'd never expect her to wear one... no offense but it is true.
Humm... she laughs less, and started to use her brain capability to think before she say or do anything.. hahahaha... yes, she never done it back-day in high school.. hahahaha.
And how much have you changed? Is there anything new or different about you that she doesn't know yet?
L7: Me? hmmm... I hate 'current-me', I miss the 'old-me'... a couple days ago, she sent me images of papers that apparently were our Band Application form, i totally forgot I wrote that 'sheep'!
But that ain't the point, the content of the application is. The current-me would never answer those questions... like that.. current me would do it a lot more.. normally!
And I still knew how to hand-write lower case letters. Nowadays, I only write uppers!
What should I ask her when I talk to her?
L7: "Risk... why did you do that?" (She'll know what I mean) hahahaha. And how cool does it take to be called 'cool man'? Btw, can you please please please give me a copy of "KHARISMA"!!!
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my answer.
What drew you to L7 when you first met him?
R: awalnya gue kira dia nerd dengan kebanggaan berlebih pada kawasan BSD. tapi setelah Reipura suka ngajak dia ngobrol, dan lalu gue juga mau nggak mau terlibat ngobrol, akhirnya jadi tau kalo 'ni anak otaknya emang "gak biasa" (i'm trying to be nice here). tapi mungkin memang gue selalu tertarik sama orang-orang yang gak biasa karena apa yang gue pikirin juga seringnya "gak biasa." bukannya pengen terkesan anti-mainstream, besides, being not-so-normal was not so cool in the 90's. tapi emang gue cuma bisa tertarik dan nyambung sama mereka yang "bikin hidup lebih HIDUP" *i put a popular tagline from the 90's for the sake of the era*
You guys were in a band together? What was that about?
R: well, yeah... itu band yang proses nyari namanya lebih lama dibanding kesempatan manggungnya. time record for the latter is zero, btw.
even though our band kinda sucked, but the friendship was heartwarming. to me it was. gue inget banget momen latihan di rumah Poer; waktu itu ujan but i felt so warm inside because i was amongst things i loved the most: my dear friends and the music.
Did he play an important part in your adolescence years?
R: I think he surely did. dia ngenalin gue sama bermusik, not just listening to music. dan somehow it makes me appreciate music more, karena range musik yang didengar juga berkembang akibat dia ngenalin gue pada jimsaku dan incognito. dan gara-gara dia juga, kehidupan masa SMA gue jadi lebih berwarna. yang tadinya gak berani bolos jadi biasa.
yang tadinya nggak kenal serpong jadi berani ngangkot untuk nyari rumahnya di BSD.
ngobrol sama dia juga menghibur dan menyehatkan. karena sama dia, gue bisa jadi diri sendiri. selain itu, ocehan dan gaya bercerita dia juga selalu bisa bikin gue ngakak.
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| oh look at us.. finally could strike a socially-acceptable pose |
What do you think makes your friendship last this long?
R: Because
1) we never hooked up,
2) we're the same type of people. gue baru menyadari ini setelah ketemu dia lagi tahun ini. we're drawn together because secara garis besar, we think alike. mungkin dia melanglang buana ke eropa sementara i'm so domesticated i feel too tired to travel. atau mungkin dia single (and desperate? hahaha) sementara gue settling in a 7-year marriage and become a mother. tapi, all in all, how we think, how we perceive things, what we like, what we laugh about, semuanya SETIPE. yak, bukan sama, tapi setipe. and just because i like odd numbers, there should be a
3) because we want this friendship to last. geer yah, gue? but i do believe so. no matter who he dates, or what 'strange' hobby he's into, he would always 'show up' at my 'door' and take me to an emji someplace.
Is there any trivia regarding your friendship?
R: well...
- Gue punya 2 best friend cowok; him and Pooh Bear. dan anehnya, they share the same birthday. exactly same day, month, and year. both of them are also passionate, smart, dan "gak biasa."
- Songs that remind me of him: any Jimsaku songs, "Dia"-nya Reza, "Torn"-nya Natalie Imbruglia, "I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing," "Tak Ingin"-nya Wong, and "I Want to Hold Your Hand." yep, every single song P24/Splash band (that was the best name we could come up with) had ever rehearsed.
- The following is to answer his questions; Kharisma itu nama majalah sekolah yang pernah kita godok bersama-sama. Too bad gue nggak simpen copynya, ey. And "Cooool Man" was the line i and Reipura used to catcall a friend called Bicler. He was well-built like a binaragawan... and damn he was soooo "cool" with that sterek body hahaha. And lastly, to answer his obscure question: i did THAT because i WAS me haha....
so, i guess in this universe, when Harry met Sally, he can become her friend for the next 18 years and stick together "just because" they find comfort in their friendship.
oh, and guess what? i think it's randomly coincidental, but adit and i put the iconic line from "When Harry Met Sally" on our wedding card invitation. it goes like this:
...i hope he too would find his "Sally," as soon as possible :)
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